I froze outside the courtyard, unable to step in or walk away. Instead, I stood by the wall, an eavesdropper in my own home, listening as Xiao Yi Han replied with indifference:
“I understand that dealing with demons invites criticism from Xian Ling Sect disciples. But since I’ve taken a disciple and graduated as a master, my affairs are no longer my master’s concern.”
The words I had spoken so boldly at the academy—defending him with all my conviction—suddenly felt like slaps to my own face, ringing loud and clear.
“You!” Grandmaster was livid. “And what about that so-called disciple of yours? You only took her in so you could graduate as a master. All these years, what have you even taught her? How have you repaid the trust placed in you?”
Grandmaster’s fury was palpable, and I felt like I could almost see him trembling with anger.
Xiao Yi Han paused for a moment. “Whether I’ve let anyone down or not, these years have already passed. As for how I act now—if Master believes I’ve strayed from the path and disgraced the sect, then go ahead and expel me from Xian Ling Sect.”
Grandmaster fell silent at his words. After a long pause, there was only a deep and heavy sigh. “Everyone has their own fate. As your master, I can no longer control you. Do what you wish. But remember, once a master, always a master. No matter what, you are my disciple, and I will never expel you.”
The courtyard was silent for what felt like an eternity before a flash of light signaled Grandmaster’s departure on his sword.
I stood frozen at the gate, unsure how long I remained there. Suddenly, the gate creaked open. Xiao Yi Han stepped out and saw me standing at the entrance. He paused, but instead of asking anything, he spoke as casually as ever: “Well, you’re back early today.”
I looked up at him and asked, “Master, when you go down the mountain… are you really meeting with demons?”
Xiao Yi Han was silent for so long I thought he wouldn’t answer. But eventually, he replied, “Ah, probably.” His tone was careless, almost flippant, as if the matter didn’t concern him at all.
Yet I pressed on, my voice steady and unyielding. “Is it that demoness from before?”
He hesitated briefly, then nodded. “Yes, it’s her.”
I stared at him intently, and for the first time, his usually lazy smile faltered. His lips pressed together slightly, as though forming an invisible armor, bracing himself for the sharp accusations he assumed I was about to hurl.
Even I thought I might question him—accuse him of betraying the immortal path, of colluding with demons, just like the rumors. But when I opened my mouth, the words that came out surprised even me:
“Did you only take me as your disciple because you wanted to graduate?”
The question had nothing to do with what we had just been discussing. As soon as I asked, I froze, stunned by my own words. Xiao Yi Han looked equally startled, his carefully built defenses now misaligned and aimless.
Before I could stop myself, I followed up with another question, my voice tinged with a faint bitterness and stubbornness. “So, back then… if you had seen any other child on the street, could they have become your disciple too? Even if it wasn’t me?”
I realized then that this was what truly mattered to me.
Years of studying, learning morality, following the sect’s strict rules—it all paled in comparison to my need to be special in Xiao Yi Han’s eyes.
Because to me, he was special.
I looked at him, stubbornly waiting for an answer.
Xiao Yi Han collected himself, his surprise fading, and his gaze drifted toward the distant, misty peaks of Xian Ling Mountain. “Of course, not just anyone would do.” He paused, then curved his lips into a careless smile. “After all, compared to other kids, you were the easiest to take with me.”
For a moment, my breath caught, and my heart seemed to stop.
Yes, back then, I was a beggar. And beggars could be bought with money.
Other children couldn’t be bought—but a beggar could.
His words pierced my heart like an arrow.
I stared at him blankly, at the indifferent curve of his lips and the cold detachment in his eyes. It felt as though my heart had been cast into a bottomless abyss, plummeting endlessly. The cold wind tore at me, the chill cutting deep, until I hit the ground, shattered into a mess of red and broken pieces.
Xiao Yi Han’s second great sin was this:
He was the person most skilled at breaking hearts with a smile.
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