Li Zi nodded and started toward the door, but I called her back. After a moment of hesitation, I added, “Don’t tell Chen Qiao Luo about this. I don’t want him to worry.”
I knew that over the years, Li Zi had kept in touch with Chen Qiao Luo, updating him about my life. But this—this was something I didn’t want him to know. Time was no longer on my side. I wouldn’t be able to share in his future happiness, and the only thing I could do for him now was to let him believe I truly didn’t want to be with him. At least this way, he wouldn’t have to endure the pain of losing me.
I had experienced that kind of despair when Gu Yu passed away, and I couldn’t bear to see Chen Qiao Luo go through the same. He was the person I loved most. How could I allow him to suffer like that?
Seeing my determination, Li Zi said nothing more and nodded repeatedly.
That night, Li Zi lay beside me on the hospital bed. Neither of us spoke, but in the stillness of the night, I could feel the subtle trembling of her shoulders. I knew she was crying, but I didn’t know how to comfort her.
My dad arrived early the next morning. He looked utterly worn out—his eyes bloodshot, likely from a sleepless night and the long journey to get here. As soon as he saw me, he pulled me into a tight embrace. He held me so firmly, it was as though he wanted to fuse me into his very bones.
The lump in my throat grew unbearable, and I couldn’t hold back my tears.
Behind him, Aunt Shen entered the room. Seeing us like this, she stood by the door, tears streaming silently down her face.
It felt like an eternity before Dad finally released me. His voice, choked with emotion, said, “Zhu Yun Hao, you disobedient child. How could you not take better care of yourself? How long was I gone? How could you let yourself end up like this? How am I supposed to go on living without you…”
His anger gradually gave way to uncontrollable sobbing.
Seeing him like this, I could no longer hold back and cried openly as well. Between sobs, I stammered, “Dad, I’m sorry… I’m so sorry…”
Yes, if there was anyone in this world I owed the most, it was my dad. He raised me single-handedly for so many years, and I hadn’t even had the chance to repay him. Now, I was going to force him—the one with white hair—to bury me, his child with black hair. There’s nothing crueler in life than this. Perhaps it’s punishment for not cherishing myself enough in the past.
I stayed in the hospital for a week. During that time, Li Zi came to see me nearly every day, while Dad stayed by my side constantly, refusing to leave. In just those seven days, he seemed to age ten years.
Hospitals are perhaps the most despairing places in the world, filled with too many lives slipping away daily.
The doctors told us that if I underwent surgery, my survival rate was less than 3%. If I didn’t, I could live for about another year.
At that moment, I realized my life had an endpoint. Strangely, I no longer felt afraid.
I told Dad that I wanted to go home—I didn’t want to stay in the hospital. Though reluctant, he eventually agreed to my request.
I knew he wanted to fulfill every wish I had left during my remaining days.
I took a leave from school. Each day, I accompanied Aunt Shen to the market, learning how to cook from her.
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