Fang Ke Xin was taken aback. This was the first time in two years she had heard him mention Zhang Yi Ling. She had assumed Yi Ling was a taboo topic, a scar buried deep in his heart, never to be revealed. But now, he spoke of her as if discussing the weather.
After a pause, she hesitantly asked, “Master He, how do you feel about her now?”
“It’s been two years,” he replied with a faint smile. “Why make things difficult for myself? It was her choice, and I respect that. Besides, she left so decisively. Even if I held on, I couldn’t keep her. It’s all in the past now.”
There was no sadness in his eyes, no trace of bitterness—just pure acceptance. He was no longer the man from that rainy night, broken and devastated.
He had let go.
Fang Ke Xin, however, wondered when she or anyone else trapped in the past would be able to move on. Without letting go, how could one ever find happiness?
* * *
After Li Jie and Fang Ke Xin left, He Su Ye sat alone in his study, staring at the herbal specimens on the shelves. These were all collected by Zhang Yi Ling during their time at school. She had insisted that to master Chinese medicine, one needed to be surrounded by it, immersed in its presence.
She had always been a fiercely ambitious woman, never allowing herself to fail. She aimed for the best grades, the most distinctive style, and even the perfect boyfriend. But had he truly been the “perfect” choice?
He recalled one autumn when the dean summoned them both to the office.
“We have a government-sponsored scholarship for studying abroad,” the dean had said. “The faculty unanimously nominated one of you. I’ll leave it to you two to decide who should go.”
He knew how difficult it was for someone studying integrated Western and Chinese medicine to get such an opportunity. And yet, he had seen the longing and determination in Zhang Yi Ling’s eyes.
He had immediately given in.
But he had miscalculated. He had thought she would discuss it with him, persuade him to step aside. He would have agreed—happily, even—because he loved her.
Instead, she disappeared for three days.
On the fourth day, she stood by his bed and announced, “He Su Ye, I’m leaving. The department has selected me to study in the United States.”
He had forced a smile and congratulated her, but inside, he was crushed. Then he noticed a bruise on her neck. Grabbing her hand, he demanded, “How did you get that spot? Tell me the truth!”
She had coldly brushed him off. “I got the scholarship on my own terms. Satisfied? I knew your grandfather could influence the decision, so I acted first.”
Heartbroken, he told her, “If you had just asked me, you know I would have given it to you. Why did you have to degrade yourself?”
Her eyes were unflinching. “I didn’t want to owe you anything. This way, I can leave without any attachments.”
“Yi Ling,” he asked, “did you ever love me?”
She didn’t answer immediately, but he eventually got the truth.
On the rainy night before her departure, she said, “I’ve always wanted the best—the best grades, the best clothes. I told myself I would have the best boyfriend and the best husband. So yes, He Su Ye, I loved you because you were the best. But I’ll go abroad and meet someone even better. And when I do, I won’t love you anymore.”
The truth had shattered him. She hadn’t loved him for who he was but for what he represented—a stepping stone to greater things.
Sighing, he shook off the memories and began tidying the kitchen. Noticing that he was out of eggs and bread for breakfast, he grabbed his coat and headed to the nearby grocery store.
1 Comments
Usually characters like her would come crawling back later and would started bugging him to take her back. Then she would delude herself into believing that he hasn’t gotten over her because he remained single for x-amount of years.
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