Her voice turned wistful. “Looking back, I was so foolish. What was there to cling to in a man like that? I threw away my pride and dignity, begging him to stay, promising to change every part of myself he didn’t like. But… what did I do wrong? If he stopped liking me, even my strengths became flaws in his eyes.”
She remembered the first day of senior year vividly. She’d gone to the library to return a book and ran into Yan Heng as he was leaving. Seeing his familiar face, she felt an odd sense of alienation. He smiled faintly at her and walked away. Once, he would have stopped to wait for her, even whining, “Xiao Fan, hurry up! I’ve been waiting forever!”
Their breakup had started with a fight over the summer—a seemingly trivial argument. Shen Xi Fan thought it was just playful bickering and continued joking around afterward. But gradually, Yan Heng’s texts and calls grew infrequent. Sometimes, he wouldn’t respond to her messages for an entire day. She found herself constantly staring at her phone, unable to let it out of her sight.
That summer felt endless.
She’d sensed something was off but never expected that one evening he would ask to break up, only to start dating Gu Ning Yuan—the campus beauty from the Chemistry Department—the very next day.
She felt like a discarded toy, played with until it broke and then thrown away.
Desperate, she bombarded him with texts and calls, all saying the same thing: “What did I do wrong? Tell me, and I’ll change. I’ll never upset you again.” Eventually, he gave her an answer:
“What I once loved about you has become what I hate. I can’t stand how clingy you are, how you always interrupt my life. You’ve taken away my freedom. Honestly, you’re just annoying now.”
That was when she finally gave up. Even breathing felt painful. Her entire body—skin, bones, every part of her—seemed to scream in despair.
I only wanted to be with you because I loved you so much. I didn’t want to be apart, even for a second.
To this day, she couldn’t understand how the person who loved first and deepest ended up losing so completely.
There was a trace of emotion in Shen Xi Fan’s eyes, but she kept smiling as she drank water and pretended nothing had happened. She continued playing cards casually. Lin Yi Shen watched her silently, a pang of sadness gripping his heart.
He’d known this junior from years ago. Her ex-boyfriend, Yan Heng, had been popular on campus. Lin had seen them together a few times, though they wouldn’t have known who he was—he was two years ahead of them. Campus couples were a common sight, and he usually passed by with indifference. But for some reason, this couple left a lasting impression.
When they were together, the girl’s radiant smile was unforgettable—pure, sweet, and genuine. Even as an outsider, he couldn’t help but feel her happiness.
Later, when Lin Yi Shen saw Shen Xi Fan again, it was in the interview hall. Her smile was faint but still comforting. During the interview, when the HR manager asked her how she would balance work and personal life, he clearly remembered her answer: “I don’t have a boyfriend, so there’s nothing to balance. I just want to focus on my work.”
Only then did he understand why that radiant, happy smile had disappeared.
When Yan Heng arrived at the hotel, Lin Yi Shen recognized him immediately. Out of personal bias, Lin took it upon himself to handle several matters related to Yan Heng, even those beyond his jurisdiction. He had also pushed for Ding Wei to oversee the collaboration with Zhong Yu.
Because he didn’t want Shen Xi Fan to suffer again. She had been hurt once—there was no reason for her to endure it a second time.
Yan Heng didn’t deserve her love.
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