“Yeah, you’re right. It’s awful, isn’t it?”
I just want her to take my side and agree with me.
Talking to Maiko irritates me, but for some reason, I can’t distance myself from her.
When we go shopping together, I find myself wanting the same things she picks out. If Maiko wears a cute ribbon, I want one too. I want to prove that I can pull off cute things better than she can.
‘She could at least look a little annoyed,’ I think.
But no matter what happens, Maiko stays calm, and that annoys me even more.
If Maiko gets close to a boy, I start to get interested in him too. I want him to choose me over Maiko, who’s smarter but less cute.
Most boys fall for me when I show interest. But even then, Maiko doesn’t react. She stays as unaffected as ever.
If a boy were good enough to make her jealous, I might like him more. But if Maiko isn’t interested, he doesn’t seem worth it to me, and I lose interest.
Maiko is tall, slim, calm, intelligent, and has many friends.
My mom always says, “You should learn from Maiko. Did you know she was top of her class in the last exam? Her mom told me. I’m so jealous of the Fukui family.”
Even my mom praises Maiko. My mom, who usually complains in an irritable tone, always has something nice to say about her.
‘It’s probably because you’re like that that Dad got tired of you and left!’
I swallow those words and retreat to my room, or when I can’t hold it in, I stay over at my dad’s apartment.
Hina’s father lives separately, but Maiko’s family is still together. No one has left Maiko’s household.
Being around Maiko, who has everything I want, sometimes makes me feel so inferior that I want to scream.
But even I have things where I beat Maiko.
I’m cuter than she is, have better fashion sense, and I’m better at makeup. I also know how to win over Maiko’s mom.
Her mom likes kids who are sweet. If I look like I’m about to cry and ask for advice, she gets very sympathetic.
“I wish Maiko could be as honest and adorable as Hina,” she says sometimes.
In those moments, I feel like I’ve finally beaten Maiko, and it makes me happy.
I hate Maiko.
I know that Maiko, the one I call my “best friend,” actually finds me annoying. I probably deserve it, considering everything I’ve done. But even when she seems to avoid me, I can’t help but chase after her.
I don’t even know what I want anymore. Even though I hate her, I can’t seem to let her go.
The sound of the silver-haired man’s laughter brought Hina’s wandering thoughts back to the present.
0 Comments